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Arivia
Great Reader
Canada
2965 Posts |
 Posted - 08 May 2005 : 10:39:31
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and I wouldn't mind your well wishes, either.
And...I know the emphasis here at Candlekeep has always been on the lore and not so much on the people and their daily lives.
But...this affects my work here. It might be that I can't contribute to Volume III of the Candlekeep Compendium because I'm undergoing gender identification testing or I'm having an especially hard time with self-acceptance during the submission time. And, for this, it's especially important that I don't make up excuses or dance around the issue-if I did, I'd be doing damage to myself. So, I'm telling you all-and I hope, and I know that you have the maturity to deal with it maturely. If it was a myriad of other things, I wouldn't tell you-but this needs to be said.
Some of you already know-I did mention it in the update thread for Volume II of the Compendium. I have gender identity disorder-also known as transsexualism. I'm a female in a male body. I'm not going to go into any more detail about it here, to avoid giving Alaundo headaches.
I just ask that you take three things into account:
1)Just try and be sensitive about it, as hard as it may be for you.
2)I must ask that you refer to me using the female pronoun-it helps immesurably with my self-esteem, confidence, and self-acceptance issues. It's notable that using a male pronoun to refer to me emotionally hurts me-it's almost a form of unintentional hate speech, to some degree.
3)Just take into account that I do have this-it causes massive changes in me, and makes me very sensitive and very emotional period. So if I'm acting irrational, do tell me-and I apologize in advance if I do act irrationally.
2 more things:
1)If you have questions, comments, criticisms, or just want to talk, my contact information is in my profile-and no question is unacceptable, no comment unacceptable either. Just don't say them here-I don't want to saddle Alaundo with having to deal with this anymore.
2)Thank you, and thank you in advance, for being such a good community. It's a sign of trust that I tell you this-and I hope you interpret it that way.
Thank you again,
Arivia.
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The Sage
Procrastinator Most High
Australia
31774 Posts |
Posted - 08 May 2005 : 11:26:45
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Arivia,
Let me start first by saying that I am truly honoured that you have chosen to share this with me, and with all of the community here at Candlekeep. It is a testament to the true communal spirit that makes this board a haven for all the diverse peoples who make our world great.
And in that spirit, allow me to wish you the very best in the times that are to come. Rest assured that I will continue to value our relationship here at Candlekeep to the best of my ability.
I wish you well  . May the Lady of Luck, wherever she may truly reside, watch over you  .
- Your friend in knowledge, the Sage
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Candlekeep Forums Moderator
Candlekeep - The Library of Forgotten Realms Lore
http://www.candlekeep.com -- Candlekeep Forum Code of Conduct
Scribe for the Candlekeep Compendium -- Volume IX now available (Oct 2007)
"So Saith Ed" -- the collected Candlekeep replies of Ed Greenwood
Zhoth'ilam Folio -- The Electronic Misadventures of a Rambling Sage |
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Wooly Rupert
Master of Mischief
USA
36805 Posts |
Posted - 08 May 2005 : 14:37:09
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I have another online friend who is going thru the same thing...
Beyond that statement, Sage was a heck of a lot more eloquent than I could be, but I do echo his sentiments.
Good luck, and know that you've got friends here. |
Candlekeep Forums Moderator
Candlekeep - The Library of Forgotten Realms Lore
http://www.candlekeep.com -- Candlekeep Forum Code of Conduct
I am the Giant Space Hamster of Ill Omen!  |
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Arivia
Great Reader
Canada
2965 Posts |
Posted - 08 May 2005 : 16:35:27
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| Thank you both. |
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Alaundo
Head Moderator
United Kingdom
5695 Posts |
Posted - 08 May 2005 : 19:17:43
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Well met
Indeed I wish ye all the best, Arivia and I certainly respect the courage it must have taken to announce this here at Candlekeep. Thank ye for sharing this, i'm sure ye will receive much support. If I can be of any assistance myself then please feel free to contact me privately.
With reference to thy opening comment, whilst Candlekeep does strive to focus on Realmslore, we care greatly for all our members and appreciate all the visitors to the site. I assure ye that all are greatly appreciated by myself personally, and by many people herein. Afterall, without ye all, Candlekeep would be a pretty empty and lonely place.  |
Alaundo
Candlekeep Forums Head Moderator
Candlekeep - The Library of Forgotten Realms Lore
http://www.candlekeep.com -- Candlekeep Forum Code of Conduct
An Introduction to Candlekeep - by Ed Greenwood
The Candlekeep Compendium - Tomes of Realmslore penned by Scribes of Candlekeep
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DDH_101
Master of Realmslore
Canada
1272 Posts |
Posted - 08 May 2005 : 23:09:17
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Arivia, I do not know you too well, but I want to let you know you have my best wishes and support.
To me, Candlekeep is a great place because this forum and its members do not care about things such as sexuality and ethnicity of other members because we are all here with one thing in common: our love of fantasy, D&D and the Forgotten Realms itself. I myself am Chinese, and have received racist comments in other forums, but I've never had that experience here. After all, this is Candlekeep, a place where scribes come together to share information and lore with others. We welcome anybody regardless of they are if they contribute to this forum, am I not right? Our thirst of knowledge outweighs any prejudice one would have about appearances or qualities of a person.
To quote Ed Greenwood's intro to Candlekeep: "There are always folk seeking entrance to Candlekeep." This is correct, and we are here to welcome and greet them.
So Arivia, you have shared knowledge here, and I am touched that you would trust the members to do so. I want you to know that as a fellow member here I would be one of the first to stand up to anybody reacting rudely to this. |
"Trust in the shadows, for the bright way makes you an easy target." -Mask |
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MuadDib
Senior Scribe
South Africa
442 Posts |
Posted - 09 May 2005 : 11:49:33
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It must have taken an immense amount of courage to be honest about something as important as that, and having known you for quite some time on this forum, I can say with almost certainty that everyone here respects you immensely for it and will do their utmost to be supportive and do anything they can to help you through your difficulties. We are, none of us, free of personal and emotional problems, and the support of friends and community - I'm sure we'll agree - is a huge help.
Count on us, and we will continue to count on you too :)
Much love
Alex |
MuadDib - Candlekeep Inn Barhand |
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Xysma
Master of Realmslore
USA
1089 Posts |
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Kentinal
Great Reader
4689 Posts |
Posted - 09 May 2005 : 22:03:18
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quote:
Originally posted by Arivia
and I wouldn't mind your well wishes, either.
Shade and Sweet Water.
May the divine be with you as you walk this path.
I wish you well. |
"Small beings can have small wisdom," the dragon said. "And small wise beings are better than small fools. Listen: Wisdom is caring for afterwards."
"Caring for afterwards ...? Ker repeated this without understanding.
"After action, afterwards," the dragon said. "Choose the afterwards first, then the action. Fools choose action first."
"Judgement" copyright 2003 by Elizabeth Moon |
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jebeddo
Seeker
Canada
69 Posts |
Posted - 10 May 2005 : 01:40:45
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There's possibly one thing terrible about coming late to a topic: everyone said what you wanted to say  . I echo the sentiments of all others who commented before me, for it does truly take a soul of great courage to do what you have done. Candlekeep is a popular online community, a community united not because of religion or race, but of a love of fantasy and a pursuit for lore. It is through this love that we accept and welcome any in our forums, and it is through this devotion that we are unified, regardless of who we are. You have my respect and friendship.
May the winds ever fill thy sails, and may Garl ever smile upon you. |
"Only half-orcs rush in where devas fear to tread." |
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Arivia
Great Reader
Canada
2965 Posts |
Posted - 11 May 2005 : 05:31:17
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| Thank you all-there's not much else I can say. |
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Bookwyrm
Great Reader
USA
4740 Posts |
Posted - 29 May 2005 : 06:19:36
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Well, I'm a very conservative Roman Catholic. God doesn't make mistakes; however, that doesn't mean you shouldn't work with what He gives you. After all, I'm sure He doesn't intend for someone born without legs to simply stay in one spot. God'll sort it all out in the end, so I don't see any reason to pass judgement on you.
(Ironically, possibly because of your avatar, I often had to remind myself what pronoun to use. Now I have to switch back. If I didn't know better, I'd say you did that deliberately. )
Good luck with whatever happens. |
Hell hath no fury like all of Candlekeep rising in defense of one of its own.
Download the brickfilm masterpiece by Leftfield Studios! See this page for more. |
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Thelonius
Senior Scribe
Spain
730 Posts |
Posted - 29 May 2005 : 08:22:16
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| You're brave Arivia, very brave not anyone would share something like that. Everybody of us has problems to carry, and it's a good thing to sometimes, share them with trustfully partners; you will found this partners here Arivia. Whenever need help, or only some ears to listen to you; remember that the scribes here will be always ready to you. |
"If you are to truly understand, then you will need the contrast, not adherence to a single ideal." - Kreia
"I THINK I JUST HAD ANOTHER NEAR-RINCEWIND EXPERIENCE"- Discworld's Death frustrated after Rincewind scapes his grasp... again.
"I am death, come for thee" - Nimbul, from Baldur's Gate I just before being badly spanked
Sapientia sola libertas est |
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Arivia
Great Reader
Canada
2965 Posts |
Posted - 29 May 2005 : 14:06:20
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quote:
Originally posted by Bookwyrm
God doesn't make mistakes; however, that doesn't mean you shouldn't work with what He gives you.
I don't think there was a mistake either, but we don't need to get into that here.
quote:
(Ironically, posibly because of your avatar, I often had to remind myself what pronoun to use. Now I have to switch back. If I didn't know better, Is'd say you did that deliberately. )
Maybe I did...
quote:
Good luck with whatever happens.
Thank you.
quote:
Originally posted by Thelonius Andrass
You're brave Arivia, very brave not anyone would share something like that. Everybody of us has problems to carry, and it's a good thing to sometimes, share them with trustfully partners; you will found this partners here Arivia. Whenever need help, or only some ears to listen to you; remember that the scribes here will be always ready to you.
Thank you. |
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Kiarin DAleshan
Candlekeep Inn Waitress
12 Posts |
Posted - 29 May 2005 : 23:14:35
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Arivia,
Good luck, and best wishes. You have courage enough to fly with. Let it take you where you wish to be. *hugs* Much thanks for your trust, your continued work here, and your very presence. Be well.
~Kiarin! |
Kiarin D'Aleshan
Candlekeep Inn Waitress
Moderator
An Introduction to Candlekeep - by Ed Greenwood
"This is an inn, not a tavern, m'lord!" |
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Kajehase
Great Reader
Sweden
2104 Posts |
Posted - 08 Jun 2005 : 21:50:03
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Wow, blink and thou shall miss things...
quote:
Originally posted by Jebeddo
There's possibly one thing terrible about coming late to a topic: everyone said what you wanted to say
quote:
Originally posted by Thelonius Andrass
You're brave Arivia, very brave not anyone would share something like that. Everybody of us has problems to carry, and it's a good thing to sometimes, share them with trustfully partners; you will found this partners here Arivia. Whenever need help, or only some ears to listen to you; remember that the scribes here will be always ready to you.
[/quote]
So with that in mind I suppose that all I can add is my own well-wishes and say that should I at some point say something that insults you in regards to this or a topic close to it here at Candlekeep you have my permission to bite my head off (figuratively speaking, mind you).
So, once again, good luck. |
There is a rumour going around that I have found god. I think is unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my keys, and there is empirical evidence that they exist.
Terry Pratchett |
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Snotlord
Senior Scribe
Norway
476 Posts |
Posted - 08 Jun 2005 : 23:09:21
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| Good Luck! |
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You all deserve to know...
