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Therise
Master of Realmslore
1272 Posts |
 Posted - 16 Aug 2013 : 16:21:19
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After winning a Price is Right showcase and spending a lovely two weeks at the St. Maarten resort in the Caribbean, AO returns to find that his house-sitters (aka the Gods) have moved all his furniture and left a mess best defined by his first words:
"Sonofa... what-tha... CYRIC! SHAR!"
Of course, Shar had always been trustworthy before. Usually she just left a coating of dust and moped around the whole time. But when AO took in that street kid Cyric and he started hanging out with Shar, nothing good has come of it since.
"When I find the two of you, I swear to the Designers," his collar getting hotter by the moment, he enters the bathroom to find Cyric duct-taped to the toilet and graffiti written all over the kid's face. Cyric looked up, sad and bedraggled. Clearly the popular kids had taken their revenge.
AO immediately grabbed his iPhone and angrily dialed Torm. *click* "TORM?!" AO shouted.
"Uh oh." Torm said quietly. "Hey Sune, AO's back," he whispered while trying to cover the receiver so AO couldn't hear. "Yes, he's back. No, he hasn't seen the pool yet... otherwise..."
AO dropped the phone and ran to the backyard. Sitting in his pool was a broken-off telephone pole surrounded by half-dead pygmy suckerfish. The terrorized fish held on to the pole for support.
To his left, giant clods of earth floated in the air. Angrier than he could possibly imagine, AO simply roared, "TO THE GROUND!" and the earth-clods dropped and landed in his pool. Only then did he notice all the half-drunk dragonborn kids from Abeir laying around in his pool chairs. Turning back to enter the house and deal with Cyric, he then heard the sobbing.
Coming from his walk-in safe, which was time-locked, the plaintive cries sounded female. He entered the special code to circumvent the time lock and saw Mystra, parched, tearful, and half-dead. She'd probably been locked in as a joke, and the other stupid kids didn't know about the time-lock. How long she'd been in there, AO couldn't tell, but it might've been days. Her hair was matted and her fingers were bloody as if she'd tried to claw like a bear to get out.
AO shood his head. "That's it. Final straw. None of these little rats can be trusted. EVERYTHING changes around here!"
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Female, 40-year DM of a homebrew-evolved 1E Realms, including a few added tidbits of 2E and 3E lore; played originally in AD&D, then in Rolemaster. Be a DM for your kids and grandkids, gaming is excellent for families! |
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Gyor
Master of Realmslore
1632 Posts |
Posted - 16 Aug 2013 : 16:49:26
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| Lol. |
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Kyrel
Learned Scribe
151 Posts |
Posted - 16 Aug 2013 : 18:05:24
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| I'll 2nd Gyor on that. *LOL* |
Edited by - Kyrel on 16 Aug 2013 18:06:06 |
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Irennan
Great Reader
Italy
3823 Posts |
Posted - 16 Aug 2013 : 18:30:11
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| LOL indeed. Thanks for making my day. |
Mathematics is the art of giving the same name to different things. |
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Therise
Master of Realmslore
1272 Posts |
Posted - 16 Aug 2013 : 19:28:54
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I'm in an unusual mood today, hehe! 
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Female, 40-year DM of a homebrew-evolved 1E Realms, including a few added tidbits of 2E and 3E lore; played originally in AD&D, then in Rolemaster. Be a DM for your kids and grandkids, gaming is excellent for families! |
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BEAST
Master of Realmslore
USA
1714 Posts |
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The Arcanamach
Master of Realmslore
1885 Posts |
Posted - 16 Aug 2013 : 23:24:38
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| Actually, I think Ao is just angry that he didn't win big on Jeopardy (he's not as smart as he thinks he is) and is taking it out on the kids now that he's back. That and he needs a woman really bad. |
I have a dream that one day, all game worlds will exist as one. |
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Kentinal
Great Reader
4702 Posts |
Posted - 16 Aug 2013 : 23:33:51
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quote:
Originally posted by The Arcanamach
Actually, I think Ao is just angry that he didn't win big on Jeopardy (he's not as smart as he thinks he is) and is taking it out on the kids now that he's back. That and he needs a woman really bad.
Well there is his true love out there, Lolth. |
"Small beings can have small wisdom," the dragon said. "And small wise beings are better than small fools. Listen: Wisdom is caring for afterwards."
"Caring for afterwards ...? Ker repeated this without understanding.
"After action, afterwards," the dragon said. "Choose the afterwards first, then the action. Fools choose action first."
"Judgement" copyright 2003 by Elizabeth Moon |
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Lothlos
Learned Scribe
USA
111 Posts |
Posted - 17 Aug 2013 : 15:05:42
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| LOL Thanks for the laughs |
The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.
-J.R.R. Tolkien
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sleyvas
Skilled Spell Strategist
USA
12194 Posts |
Posted - 17 Aug 2013 : 15:16:24
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| wait until he looks in the trash bin and finds all the deities. |
Alavairthae, may your skill prevail
Phillip aka Sleyvas |
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CorellonsDevout
Great Reader
USA
2708 Posts |
Posted - 17 Aug 2013 : 19:31:47
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| Haha that's great XD |
Sweet water and light laughter |
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The Arcanamach
Master of Realmslore
1885 Posts |
Posted - 17 Aug 2013 : 22:59:53
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quote:
wait until he looks in the trash bin and finds all the deities.
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I have a dream that one day, all game worlds will exist as one. |
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SirUrza
Master of Realmslore
USA
1283 Posts |
Posted - 18 Aug 2013 : 18:25:45
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quote:
Originally posted by sleyvas
wait until he looks in the trash bin and finds all the deities.
I'd be more worried about when he goes in the garage and sees how many miles Cyric and Shar put on his 1961 Ferrari Spyder. ;) |
"Evil prevails when good men fail to act."
The original and unapologetic Arilyn, Aribeth, Seoni Fanboy. |
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The Arcanamach
Master of Realmslore
1885 Posts |
Posted - 19 Aug 2013 : 02:26:24
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quote:
I'd be more worried about when he goes in the garage and sees how many miles Cyric and Shar put on his 1961 Ferrari Spyder. ;)
+1k for this reference...no need to worry though, I'm sure Cyric's antics caused it to be thrown backwards down a cliff.  |
I have a dream that one day, all game worlds will exist as one. |
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Topic |
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What really happened when AO came home
