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Dracons
Learned Scribe

USA
299 Posts

Posted - 08 Nov 2010 :  00:44:22  Show Profile  Visit Dracons's Homepage Send Dracons a Private Message  Reply with Quote  Delete Topic

What insane stuff have you gotten away with your characters?

I got away with an insane stunt the other day. We recently taken a pirate's ship, and are reformating it to serve us. At a dock in Calimport, the dock master charged us 120 gold pieces to dock. I gave him 12 silver pieces, and rolled an extremely high bluff check, and he rolled a natural 1 on his sense motive check. He belived me when I stated they were plat pieces.

Later, my ship was attacked, and since that high toll was suppose to protect my ship, my barbarian rogue dwarf stormed into the dock master and demanded a refund. Rolled a great intimidate, and I got refunded. 12 plat pieces.

So I got a 120 gold pieces, by spending 12 silver pieces. A 118 gp and 8 silver pice profit. Not bad for a 5 level character.

I love PMs! Please send me a message. Even if its Hi.

Alystra Illianniis
Great Reader

USA
3750 Posts

Posted - 08 Nov 2010 :  05:16:21  Show Profile Send Alystra Illianniis a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Bravo! My gamer hat's off to you.

I once pulled a pretty ballsy stunt- my CE wiz/assassin half-drow/gray elf Morganna (Some of you may have heard tales of her from her brother in the inn) was on a job to kill a king. She used invisibility to get past his undead guards, and levitated up into an upper-level room, then founf the room he was in- and teleported through the doors with blade drawn, and whacked off his head as soon as she saw him- only to discover that his personal guard was none other than the death knight Lord Soth!! She narrowly saved against his wall of ice, and managed to teleport out again, with kingie's head still in hand, back to her employer. Got the job done, and got paid, albeit after peeing herself at realizing she had just pissed off a VERY powerful enemy...

The Goddess is alive, and magic is afoot.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins" -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

"You idiots! You've captured their STUNT doubles!" -Spaceballs

Lothir's character background/stats: http://forum.candlekeep.com/pop_profile.asp?mode=display&id=5469

My stories:
http://z3.invisionfree.com/Mickeys_Comic_Tavern/index.php?showforum=188

Lothir, courtesy of Sylinde (Deviant Art)/Luaxena (Chosen of Eilistraee)
http://sylinde.deviantart.com/#/d2z6e4u
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Ayrik
Great Reader

Canada
7989 Posts

Posted - 10 Nov 2010 :  09:31:19  Show Profile Send Ayrik a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Why, I'm a good boy. I would never dare to take advantage of another soul. Bless them all.

[/Ayrik]
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Marquant Volker
Learned Scribe

Greece
273 Posts

Posted - 12 Nov 2010 :  13:19:56  Show Profile Send Marquant Volker a Private Message  Reply with Quote
okies here is my funny story, happened during the celebrations of the reclamation of Myth Drannor.

The scene: Cormanthyr, around the Standing Stone.
Famous elf-friends, local lords and kings, heralds, merchants, spies etc where gathered in order to see the end of the crusade, and to recognize the new elven realm, and crown the new coronal

The Facts:
1) One PC is a trusted elf-friend, and herald of the Everqueen (he started as an send-him-only-to-other-humans herald, but he got bigger) has found the ruler's blade, and he will give it to the elf of his choise in order to be tested by the blade itselt. Of course this is a secret nobody knows it.

2) There is a freaking lot of espionage around, and the PCs are playing along, chasing and spreading roumours etc

3) Kelben and Laeral are around

The story:
One of tha party starts spitting information (about a different matter) just to entairtain those around him, Harpers and Moonstars compete for whom will get him first (everything nice and friendly) Moonstars win, as the player with the rulers blade have a private chat with Khelben and shares the information (he owed him a favour)

Now Khelben has to go immidiatly in order to gain ground from Harpers, however if he leaves the ceremony suspicions will rise. He looks around, noone watching. Great. He transform the elffriend to Khelben, sends a message to Laeral and teleports away...!!!
(the poor PC trying to warn him about the sword he had to deliver but Khelben was already gone)

The challenge: My PC is astonished, new he gotta pretend he is Khelben (remember Khelben is a friend he cant go crying to the guards) meet officials with Laeral, talk politics you know Blackstaff's stuff :-P

The result:
1 ) He was flirting Laeral all evening, she played along (people were watching and hey, that was fun)

2) He played a trick to his fellow adventurers, he appeared to them and gave them a quest that sounded like a "Journey of no return" . Lots of fun

3 ) He organized Khelben's schedule for the next month, the appointments were mostly random and with the most boring and weird people there.

4 ) ...and the most spectecular of all: Khelben Arunsun "The blackstaff" became official the Herald of the Rulers blade, as he presented it to the future Coronal (lady Miritar)

Khelben was not happy when he heard the news!

The session was a blast!


Edited by - Marquant Volker on 12 Nov 2010 13:27:33
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mensch
Seeker

80 Posts

Posted - 12 Nov 2010 :  14:23:00  Show Profile Send mensch a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I attacked two dormant golems with regular arrows once, because I'd decided earlier that my roguish ability to sense danger was reason enough to attack any possible threat to the party. It turned out they were friendly guardians and just wanted us to solve a riddle. To my defense, I didn't know those creatures were golems, both OOC and IC, and rolled a 1 on my attack...

Some say the world will end in fire, Some say in ice. From what I’ve tasted of desire I hold with those who favor fire. But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of hate to know that for destruction ice is also great and would suffice. – Robert Frost (1874 - 1963)
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Laerrigan
Learned Scribe

USA
195 Posts

Posted - 15 Nov 2010 :  06:26:07  Show Profile  Visit Laerrigan's Homepage Send Laerrigan a Private Message  Reply with Quote
My long-running PC wizard has always been a packrat, collecting very odd and seemingly pointless things in his haversack and on his person, and later finding equally odd uses for them. One time he chopped off a vampire's hand, and the vampire was subsequently destroyed. I asked the DM if the hand would regenerate a new vampire (half-jokingly); he didn't know for sure and said "Why not..." So the hand remained animated, and several times a day I used small amounts of acid or fire to cauterize the stump and keep it from growing. Handy was fond of making impolite gestures, and was extremely grouchy due to his unenviable situation in (un)life. My weasel familiar amused himself by wrestling with the new pet.

Some days later, we had to get into a particular wagon in a passing caravan. In the midst of various distractions by the rogue and my (low-level) magic, I found myself invisibly facing a guard just outside the wagon door I was aiming for, surrounded by other guards who were starting to be un-distracted, and the rogue was somewhere off the road setting things on fire. Low on spells, I yanked Handy out of my pack, shook him really hard to tick him off, and used him for an attack on the male guard's personal region (losing my invisibility in the process). Handy grabbed hold with all the strength and vindictiveness of an extremely angry vampire. The guard fell writhing (and shocked), and I got into the wagon while the DM was laughing too hard to come up with something for another guard nearby to do about it.

"Your 'reality,' sir, is lies and balderdash, and I'm delighted to say that I have no grasp of it whatsoever." (Baron Munchausen)
"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was not made for this world." (C.S. Lewis, "Surprised by Joy")

Edited by - Laerrigan on 15 Nov 2010 06:28:51
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Jorin Embersmith
Acolyte

USA
48 Posts

Posted - 07 Dec 2010 :  01:11:11  Show Profile Send Jorin Embersmith a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Jorin I was in the Temple of Elemental Evil a while back. One of his items was an Everfull Mug that created weak dwarven ale. Well, you all know that dragon in the island in the middle? Well, sadly Jorin I the Gem Mage (idolizing the great Nezram) got caught sneaking around. The dragon snatched him up in his claws and prepared to eat him.

I had an idea!

Me: Oh, I'm going to bluff him into thinking I'm actually a disguised acolyte! (Both myself and my char were a wee bit tipsy from the rum/dwarven ale)
DM- oooook....what do you do?
Me: I wuss-slap him across the face!
DM: YOU DO WHAT?
Me: You heard me! I pimp-slap 'im! Then I tell him to put me down and let me go about my duties to Therizdun!
DM: You are SO dead....<roll roll>
Me: <roll> OH YEA! NAT 20! I SLAP HIM ACROSS THE FACE THREE TIMES MORE! Wuss-SLAPPPPPP!
DM: Holy crap on a cracker. The Dragon fumbles. He puts you down and bows his head respectfully.
Me: Thaaaat's right. MY house. I stroll nonchalantly out of sight then run like hell.

Karavarus: I polymorph into a Hydra and let loose a bellowing roar! Is he intimidated?
Me: No, but the female hydra behind him certainly notices you...
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Alystra Illianniis
Great Reader

USA
3750 Posts

Posted - 07 Dec 2010 :  19:43:18  Show Profile Send Alystra Illianniis a Private Message  Reply with Quote
ROFL!! Not me, but one of my players had a fun encounter with a pair of were-tiger guard (charmed, of course) in a mad wizard's tower. He(my cousin, playing an elf fighter) had gone up to the third level looking for clues to the location of a captive cat-lord(the wizard was using him for experiments in controling feline creatures). When he ran into the guards, he pretended to be looking for the privey. They didn't buy it. They chased him down a hall, that led to a dead end, with a window. He jumped out of it, and caught himself on the sill, narrowly avoiding falling on top of the wemics guarding the front door outside. The guards did not. There ensued a big cat-pile-up below, and he climbed back up and rejoined the party. I laughed my hiney off!

The Goddess is alive, and magic is afoot.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins" -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

"You idiots! You've captured their STUNT doubles!" -Spaceballs

Lothir's character background/stats: http://forum.candlekeep.com/pop_profile.asp?mode=display&id=5469

My stories:
http://z3.invisionfree.com/Mickeys_Comic_Tavern/index.php?showforum=188

Lothir, courtesy of Sylinde (Deviant Art)/Luaxena (Chosen of Eilistraee)
http://sylinde.deviantart.com/#/d2z6e4u
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chamber101
Seeker

57 Posts

Posted - 14 Mar 2011 :  18:25:05  Show Profile Send chamber101 a Private Message  Reply with Quote
One of my players had a monk with improvised weapons feat. He beat a sorcerer to submission with his own rat familiar once (I ruled that the rat did 1d4 non lethal to both the sorcerer and the rat)
We were falling about as I described the 'squeak/thunk' sound then just a 'thunk' sound on its own after a couple of hits.
He even critted with it once.

Edited by - chamber101 on 14 Mar 2011 18:26:23
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Brynweir
Senior Scribe

USA
436 Posts

Posted - 14 Mar 2011 :  21:49:54  Show Profile Send Brynweir a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I told this one on here before some place (likely the inn) so I'll give the short version.

My character and another were thieves breaking into a wizard's home. The guy with me got caught going in an upper window, and my character went to the wizard's front door and just knocked. When he answered, we argued, and he told me to leave or he would call the guard. I told him I would call them, and I did. Then I convinced them that he was a pedophile who had kidnapped my "little brother." While they were looking about and talking to the wizard we managed to get the ring we were sent for, we got the wizard arrested for evidence of treason or something found while they were there, and we escaped with no consequences.

I think everyone was just so shocked at the audacity of it that I was able to pull it off...
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Ayrik
Great Reader

Canada
7989 Posts

Posted - 14 Mar 2011 :  23:35:48  Show Profile Send Ayrik a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I've never seen a character wield a rat in combat before. Though one of my players (a 1st player noob at the time) spent all his gold on other stuff and could afford no weapon; he bludgeoned his first orcs down with a fish. For reasons I'd rather not explain here, fish-whomping has now evolved into a celebrated tradition within my group.

[/Ayrik]
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chamber101
Seeker

57 Posts

Posted - 15 Mar 2011 :  02:06:08  Show Profile Send chamber101 a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Arik

I've never seen a character wield a rat in combat before. Though one of my players (a 1st player noob at the time) spent all his gold on other stuff and could afford no weapon; he bludgeoned his first orcs down with a fish. For reasons I'd rather not explain here, fish-whomping has now evolved into a celebrated tradition within my group.



haha thats great! Your fishy experience reminds me of a PC wildmage who was a bit nutty and asked me if he could give the spells he cast different descriptions. I figured this was ok as I allow a lot of artistic license when making your character unique (as long as it doesnt toy with the rules of course).
Imagine my face next session when he next cast Bigby's clenched fist and he described that instead of a large disembodied fist, a halfling wielding a 30 pound halibut appeared...
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Wooly Rupert
Master of Mischief
Moderator

USA
36912 Posts

Posted - 15 Mar 2011 :  03:07:33  Show Profile Send Wooly Rupert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I could have sworn I once read in Dragon about an unarmed barbarian using a gnome as a weapon... But I'll be dipped if I can find that reference.

Candlekeep Forums Moderator

Candlekeep - The Library of Forgotten Realms Lore
http://www.candlekeep.com
-- Candlekeep Forum Code of Conduct

I am the Giant Space Hamster of Ill Omen!
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Ayrik
Great Reader

Canada
7989 Posts

Posted - 15 Mar 2011 :  03:22:59  Show Profile Send Ayrik a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I vaguely recall some movie or TV show wherein a hero (Conan? Hercules?) battered a group of assailants with the large leg of mutton he'd been feasting upon, then continued eating it after the interruption was finished.

[/Ayrik]
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Dalor Darden
Great Reader

USA
4216 Posts

Posted - 15 Mar 2011 :  03:47:40  Show Profile Send Dalor Darden a Private Message  Reply with Quote
My crippled fighter "hugged" a lich when the party encountered it so that it couldn't cast a spell...while the party beat on it (and occasionally me) until we took it down.

I was nearly frozen to death...but we did well.

I loved that character actually...Maelkith Karn. Thinking about playing him again some day...should probably make him my first Golarion character!

The Old Grey Box and AD&D for me!
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Erik Scott de Bie
Forgotten Realms Author

USA
4598 Posts

Posted - 16 Mar 2011 :  15:48:09  Show Profile  Visit Erik Scott de Bie's Homepage Send Erik Scott de Bie a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I was playing a warmage (high CHA but no real diplomacy or bluff skills) in a party hired to take down these bad guys in some sort of abandoned temple. We got in there and fought one fairly easy battle, but apparently picked the wrong door, because we ended up face-to-face with the BBEG (big bad evil guy) and all his thugs (who we had planned to lure our throughout the course of the adventure). We're seriously staring at like 20 armed men, plus the leader and his principle bodyguard (some wickedly armed troll warrior), and the BBEG starts laughing at us.

To which I immediatley say something along the lines of "Well, there you are. What have you been doing all this time?"

Everyone's a little startled, and the BBEG looks at me like "WTH?" (what the Helm)

To which I promptly convinced him, through a series of ridiculous bluff checks, that not only was I hired by his employer (who I didn't know, so I just said "you know who") but that I was his superior and dispatched here to give him an important message.

One that he wouldn't want his brutes to hear, so he and I should go in the isolated back room with the sound-proof walls.

Oh, and my bodyguards (i.e. the rest of the PCs) will accompany me as well, of course. He wouldn't want anything to happen to his boss's lieutenant.

The party won that day.

Cheers

Erik Scott de Bie

'Tis easier to destroy than to create.

Author of a number of Realms novels (GHOSTWALKER, DEPTHS OF MADNESS, and the SHADOWBANE series), contributor to the NEVERWINTER CAMPAIGN GUIDE and SHADOWFELL: GLOOMWROUGHT AND BEYOND, Twitch DM of the Dungeon Scrawlers, currently playing "The Westgate Irregulars"
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Alystra Illianniis
Great Reader

USA
3750 Posts

Posted - 17 Mar 2011 :  05:23:01  Show Profile Send Alystra Illianniis a Private Message  Reply with Quote
LOL!! That's just too rich, Erik.

Oh, Arik, that movie you recall might have been Red Sonya. There's a scene where the fat guardian of the young prince who joins her falls down a vent chute onto a table loaded with food- right in the middle of the evil queen's guards having dinner. He breaks the table falling on it, grabs a leg o' mutton, and then starts beating them with it and taking bites in between. Even ends up turning the table into a see-saw, at one point, flinging a guard across the room when he falls back on the end of the broken table. Hilarious scene!

One of my best stunts ever was pulling off an assassination of a king with my evil half-drow wizard/assassin be-otch Morganna. She snuck into his stronghold easily, even evading a number of undead guards (which should have tipped me off that something fishy was up). She teleported into his room from the outer corridor, and critted him for an instant decap with her dagger- then saw who was in the room with him. It was the nastiest death knight of all, Soth!! Unperturbed, (secretly wetting her pants) she deadpan asked ol' Soth if he'd like to work for her, since his boss was now deceased. His answer was a wall of ice above her. She fortunately dodged it, then teleported the heck out and back to her employer, with king's head still in hand. It was the most heart-stopping game I've EVER played!! (She was only a level 7 at the time!)

The Goddess is alive, and magic is afoot.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins" -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

"You idiots! You've captured their STUNT doubles!" -Spaceballs

Lothir's character background/stats: http://forum.candlekeep.com/pop_profile.asp?mode=display&id=5469

My stories:
http://z3.invisionfree.com/Mickeys_Comic_Tavern/index.php?showforum=188

Lothir, courtesy of Sylinde (Deviant Art)/Luaxena (Chosen of Eilistraee)
http://sylinde.deviantart.com/#/d2z6e4u
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ChieftainTwilight
Learned Scribe

171 Posts

Posted - 17 Mar 2011 :  08:58:58  Show Profile Send ChieftainTwilight a Private Message  Reply with Quote
heh... unfortunately, I was DM in all the FR games I'ves played... however, I can still tell stories. in fact, I have the best knowledge of them! XD

alright, so... there is the entire solo campaign me and my brother did... the whole freaking campaign was him godmoding, but I think I'll share a different campaign that has the whole group.

so, here are the Characters by Player Name. Eli the Orc Fighter (master of Bastard Sword/Shield and Bows. Cha 4), Taylor the Elf Wizard (defacto leader of the group, Eli was his henchman), Dallas the Human Cleric (had very interesting luck; he always missed his attack rolls, and healed minimum damage, but somehow enemies always dealt minimum damage to him when they hit), Justin the half-drow warrior-woman (had a high Cha for some reason, tended to seduce people, and used intimidate alot), Ivan the Halfling Rogue/Assassin (wannabe thief, who always made daring burglaries, but was paranoid of being traced so he usually threw away anything of value he found. pissed off alot of the group), and Cade the Half-Orc Barbarian (brutish guy, had ranks in Knowledge [Geography], and wanted to be a general).

the game starts off, as so many do with these guys, in a bar in Waterdeep where the group somehow starts a bar fight. almost nobody gets out alive (except for the PCs), and the city guard ends up having to call in the Grey Hands. the PCs get away, and hide out in the docks. Taylor at this point becomes the "leader" because he has a plan of action. he insists on hjacking a boat and sailing to the Moonshaes in search of treasure.

they actually pull it off real nicely. Taylor casts a Charm Person spell on the captain of a Moonshae Longship, and then convinces him to send his crew off to do something or other I can't remember right now (it was years ago). he then leads the poor captain around the coner tp where the rest of the group lies in wait, and they beat him unconscious and tie him up. afterwards, hey jack the boat and set sail.

I had fun. =w= the first ship they see when they start their pirating career is a trade Galley flying the Thann Family Coat-of-Arms. I even show them what the flag looks like, straight out of the book, and they ignore it. XD Taylor cast Obscuring Mist and then used a Whispering Wind spell to beg for supplies, claiming that they were lost at sea without provisions. he sends Eli and Ivan overboard to sneak onto the Galley and bring valuable cargo back under cover of the fog.

well, instead, they climb onto the deck, take out some of th crew, and sneak into the Cabin, where they hold the captain (Danillo Thann himself) hostage. Ivan starts looting him, uses Dan's own rod of detect magic on him, and starts tossing magic rings and items overboard. XD meanwhile, Taylor and his crew recieve a box of emergency supplies, basic stuff, and thanks the First Mate. then, Khelben materializes in the Cabin and threatens them to let his nephew go under penalty of arrest. he then bans them from ever setting foot in Waterdeep again, and tells them that they are public enemy number 1 there. XD

so, skipping ahead to the next particularly incredible antic... after a later near-failed attempt to ward off sea elves and merfolk from raiding them, Taylor has them dock in the Moonshaes. they arrive to a scene of dozens of families gathering at the harbor, excited to see their husbands and fathers return from across teh sea... only to find that while it's the same boat, it has none of the men last seen on it. instead, this rabble of sea-weary buffoons. needless to say, the Ffolk were not pleased, and the group seemed confused as to why the people were so emediately hostile to them.

they wound up arrested emmediately, and awaiting interrogation. eventually, Taylor decided to bust out. so he cast charm person on the guard, and tried to get him to hand over the keys. the other guard wasn't having it though, so Taylor cast sleep on them both. then he realized he couldn't get the keys that way. Ivan just slipped out. Taylor started to say great, and told Ivan to get him next. but Ivan said **** that and tried to take off with the boat. XD so, Taylor told Eli to stop him, cause Ivan and Eli were in the same cell. Eli gets up, bends the bars, busts Taylor out, and runs after Ivan. Taylor unlocks everybody's cells, and then they all sale away together.

Taylor starts complaining that he wants to go back, and take the rincess hostage. subsequently, the whole party turns on him and mutinies. XD Ivan tries to take command, but nobody trusts him. folks start following Eli, but Eli doesn't activily lead, as his character is a follower. XD

so, they head to the Icewind Dale. there, Dallas discivers scrimshaw. he also finds that he has a natural untrained talent for it, and puts his RL math skills to use here. everyone starts making some cash selling Scrimshaw, but eventually they grow bored, and tired of Dallas' insane advantage, that they leave without him. XD

they head over to Calimshan, where they split up and do their own things. somehow or other, Ivan and Justin end up as slaves to a wealthy aristocrat, and the rest of the party leaves to Amn without them. they start joining guilds left and right. o_O; some of them join a Mercenary Guild, which turns out to be pretty interesting.

in one mission, they had to escort a merchant of the Amnian branch of teh Thann Family to Waterdeep with his cargo of rare vintage Wine. when they get there, ther client secretly alerts Khelben, and he and the Grey Hands arrive to arrest the PCs. XD they escape, narrowly, and then hijack yet another boat (this time by brute force). they sale back to Calimshan, where it turns out that Ivan and Justin have taken command their Master's palace, and are now being beseiged by the entire ****ing city of Calimport AND ARE WINNING!

so, the PCs fly up into the palace, tell Ivan and Justin that they are here to rescue them, and they say "ok, cool." and leave. meanwhile, the authorities don't realize that their enemy has disapeared (with a shitload of treasure) and continue their siege until they break in, to find the place empty. XD

they sale back to Icewind Dale, find out that Dallas has brought on the Industrial Revolution there and monopolized the Scrimshaw Industry, and they litterally kidnap him from hs financial empire! XD they made him leave most of his wealth behind.

they go back to Amn, take on another job guarding a Half-Orc merchant from Skullport into the Underdark. along the way, they bump into a Gulgathydra in a narrow tunnel. everyone except Eli becomes sickened by the things awfull smell, and some of them can't attack. their client attacks the thing but ends up throwing up and passing out after he hits. Eli decides to pull a ballsy move; he throws a Throwing Axe at one of the stalactites above the monster.

I tell him that it's a fat chance he'll pull that one off. but he insists. he rolls, scores a critical, somehow puls off near-maximum crit damage, and I look up the rules... he overcomes the hardness enough that he deals sufficcient damage to break through a foot of stone. with a Throwing Axe. ._.

it's not done yet. XD he then sniffs it. resist being sickened. he eats it. raw. resists being sickened or diseased by it. in fact, he's perfectly fine, and well fed. everyone else who's still conscious, throws up. an nobody brought any food, so the ony thing to eat is Gulgathydra, which Eli is hoarding. XD he decides to be a real ass, and cook it subsequently, to everyone else's horror. XD

that's pretty much where we last left off, neve finished that campaign.

and a heart can only break so many times
and I've been to hell and back so many times
and I've seen folks walk away so many times
but just like anyone else I gotta stand up by myself
and a heart can only break so many times
a heart can only break so many times
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althen artren
Senior Scribe

USA
780 Posts

Posted - 18 Mar 2011 :  19:47:13  Show Profile Send althen artren a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I threw in a fire-trapped vial of Greek's fire into a sewer system
that was poorly maintained, and get seventy or eighty thousand experience points for killing everything in the sewers at that time.
Played 2 ed.

Also got the experience points for killing the Terrasque and all I did was fight off a mage sympathetic with it, and watched my follower,a steroided up Demon Dog from Ghostbusters, kill it.
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Alystra Illianniis
Great Reader

USA
3750 Posts

Posted - 19 Mar 2011 :  04:49:00  Show Profile Send Alystra Illianniis a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Demon-dog- you mean Zhuul? LOL!!! I recently had my clumsy pyromaniac pyromancer/master alchemist gnome accidentally fling a flask of alchemist's fire into the middle of a drider colony's web-nest, and burned up half the lair and one drider in the resulting explosion and fire. He had tripped when another PC hacked two of the drider's legs off and knocked him into the gnome. Beznik manages more mayhem by accident than most PC's do on purpose.

The Goddess is alive, and magic is afoot.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins" -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

"You idiots! You've captured their STUNT doubles!" -Spaceballs

Lothir's character background/stats: http://forum.candlekeep.com/pop_profile.asp?mode=display&id=5469

My stories:
http://z3.invisionfree.com/Mickeys_Comic_Tavern/index.php?showforum=188

Lothir, courtesy of Sylinde (Deviant Art)/Luaxena (Chosen of Eilistraee)
http://sylinde.deviantart.com/#/d2z6e4u
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Gouf
Seeker

USA
75 Posts

Posted - 22 Mar 2011 :  20:44:23  Show Profile  Visit Gouf's Homepage Send Gouf a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I guess the most ridiculous thing was 3 years ago. I haven't played D&D in 10 years. Out of the blue a friend called and asked me to join his group as one of their members had been pulled into reserves. So I went, they were playing 2nd Ed. which I was cool with as I have all the books. So I was informed I could roll up what ever I wanted, but my character would be the typical prisoner in the dungeon, a survivor of the previous failed rescue. So I sat at my friends dining room table surrounded by the other 5 players and started rolling up a character. Then the most ridiculous thing happened, for my initial stats, in front of 5 witnesses, I rolled 18, 14, 17, 18, 9, 18. -Apparently the dice gods had missed me. They all dropped there jaws in disbelief and one asked, "What are you gonna play?" , I replied "With rolls like that, anything I want." I ended up going with a male dwarven fighter/cleric.

When it came time in game for them to find me, I had been stripped nude, bound in chains, and was about to be sacrificed to an goblin god. They attacked the goblins causing a distraction long enough for me to make my bend bars/lift gates roll to snap the chains (-yeah, pop quiz where one of those 18's went). I then killed 2 goblins and used their bodies for clubs against the rest. Not a bad start for Blackstone, Blade of the Bright Axe.

http://blue-devil.net/add/max.jpg

:D

"Why is the torch burning blue?"

Edited by - Gouf on 22 Mar 2011 23:11:30
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Dalor Darden
Great Reader

USA
4216 Posts

Posted - 22 Mar 2011 :  21:09:32  Show Profile Send Dalor Darden a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Just remembered one:

My halfling thief was low on arrows, the party fighter was in front and being whittled down. Our cleric had just went down from a hit from the ogre in the hall looming over the fighter. The wizard was like: "If I cast this damn lightning bolt, the fighter will get hit; but if he steps back he will get nailed too!"

It was my initiative, and my cowardly halfling did NOT like the idea of being the tank against an Ogre and the orcs behind him. "I've got an idea!" he says.

I fire an arrow into the back of the fighter, he goes down; the players all yelling at me..."Fire your damned lightning bolt now!"

Wizard lets loose with 5d6, gets 21 damage (if I remember right, was 20 or more); Ogre fails saving throw and goes down...orcs go down even if they make their saving throw...end of battle.

I give a healing potion to the cleric...then run and hide while he gets up the fighter...

The Old Grey Box and AD&D for me!
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Ayrik
Great Reader

Canada
7989 Posts

Posted - 23 Mar 2011 :  01:41:34  Show Profile Send Ayrik a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I recall a PC rolling a mighty 11 points of damage with his 10d6 fireball. Then rolling 13 points with his second one. The party just retreated, they didn't even care if the giants had successfully Saved for half damage.

[/Ayrik]
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Alystra Illianniis
Great Reader

USA
3750 Posts

Posted - 23 Mar 2011 :  02:38:40  Show Profile Send Alystra Illianniis a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Dalor- I take it the halfling was CN? How very pragmatic of him. And wise to run.....

The Goddess is alive, and magic is afoot.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins" -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

"You idiots! You've captured their STUNT doubles!" -Spaceballs

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Dalor Darden
Great Reader

USA
4216 Posts

Posted - 23 Mar 2011 :  03:44:17  Show Profile Send Dalor Darden a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Alystra Illianniis

Dalor- I take it the halfling was CN? How very pragmatic of him. And wise to run.....



I think he was just Neutral...don't recall; but I know he wasn't "good" at all! Too cowardly...and not brave really.

The Old Grey Box and AD&D for me!
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ChieftainTwilight
Learned Scribe

171 Posts

Posted - 23 Mar 2011 :  03:49:50  Show Profile Send ChieftainTwilight a Private Message  Reply with Quote
XD technically, he saved that Fighter's ass! 1d6 is way better than 5d6.

and a heart can only break so many times
and I've been to hell and back so many times
and I've seen folks walk away so many times
but just like anyone else I gotta stand up by myself
and a heart can only break so many times
a heart can only break so many times
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Dalor Darden
Great Reader

USA
4216 Posts

Posted - 23 Mar 2011 :  05:24:04  Show Profile Send Dalor Darden a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by ChieftainTwilight

XD technically, he saved that Fighter's ass! 1d6 is way better than 5d6.



Technicality is a hard sell when an arrow is sticking out of your arse! LOL

I did point out to him that my arrow did a LOT less damage than an Ogre's Club!

The Old Grey Box and AD&D for me!
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ChieftainTwilight
Learned Scribe

171 Posts

Posted - 23 Mar 2011 :  18:04:37  Show Profile Send ChieftainTwilight a Private Message  Reply with Quote
and was that eventually enough to soothe his anger?

and a heart can only break so many times
and I've been to hell and back so many times
and I've seen folks walk away so many times
but just like anyone else I gotta stand up by myself
and a heart can only break so many times
a heart can only break so many times
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Dalor Darden
Great Reader

USA
4216 Posts

Posted - 23 Mar 2011 :  19:07:22  Show Profile Send Dalor Darden a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by ChieftainTwilight

and was that eventually enough to soothe his anger?





Nope. But giving him a part of my treasure from the encounter did.

Nevermind that I slipped a gem in my pouch...didn't really lose out on anything.

The Old Grey Box and AD&D for me!
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ChieftainTwilight
Learned Scribe

171 Posts

Posted - 23 Mar 2011 :  19:09:00  Show Profile Send ChieftainTwilight a Private Message  Reply with Quote
XD epic.

and a heart can only break so many times
and I've been to hell and back so many times
and I've seen folks walk away so many times
but just like anyone else I gotta stand up by myself
and a heart can only break so many times
a heart can only break so many times
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althen artren
Senior Scribe

USA
780 Posts

Posted - 11 Apr 2011 :  00:22:06  Show Profile Send althen artren a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Here's another. I started a jyhad against the church of death
when I had a giant variant following us as a "helper" He like to
smash things. I charged into the temple and killed the second in
charge while the giant was killing everybody outside. I was almost
out of spells and some reinforcements were coming from upstairs,
I read the spell change self out of my spellbook and turned myself
into a senior priest of the faith and ordered them out to kill the giant, and
got away.
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