The text below is taken from the Candlekeep Forum in this thread, and was written by Bookwyrm. The text is included here with permission. Please note that this article is intended as humor and depicts in no way the events which occur in the Faerunian Pantheon ;-)
A Day At Sune 's Beauty Salon
Sune : "Why, Mystra, dear, you're looking down. Guy trouble?"
Mystra: "You have a really simplistic view of the world. You know that, right?"
Tymora: "Wait'll you've been around a while longer. After the first few centuries, she really starts getting repetitive."
Sune : "Oh, hush. Now, tell me all about it, Midnight."
Mystra: "It's Mystra."
Sune : "Whatever. What's the trouble with Kel this time?"
Mystra: "I just can't get him to notice me anymore. He's always too busy with his job."
Sune : "Did you try that jacket I gave you?"
Mystra: "That black thing? Yes, but he just said it looked strange."
Sune : "The pig. That's going to be a big fashion in a few centuries, I bet."
Tymora: "They were mortals once, or are those curls of yours crowding out what little brains you have? They don't think in those terms. (Besides, it was a strange jacket anyway.) "
Sune : "Maybe you should just try finding someone else. Hmm . . . you know, I keep getting a lot of thank-you prayers for your man Elminster. Why not use him for a fling?"
Mystra: "Are you kidding? After all the trouble I went through to make him forget Mystra?"
Sune : "Didn't you just say you were Mystra?"
Tymora: "She means the other one."
Sune : "Which one?"
Mystra: "The previous goddess of magic? The one Helm killed?"
Sune : "Oh, her . What was she thinking then, anyway? No matter. Say, maybe you should try Helm. It's a bit of a trick to get him out of that armor, but he's something like a lobster. Lots of work, but the meat's just . . . mmm, yummy ."
Tymora: "And people claim my portfolio's limited . . . ."
Mystra: "I can't get Helm to talk to me straight anyway. I think he's feeling guilty over killing Mystra."
Sune : "Why'd you take the same name, anyway? It's just confusing."
Tymora: "Doesn't take much with you . . . ."
Sune : "Oh, hush. You're just jealous."
Tymora: "Like I could be jealous of an airhead."
Sune : "No, I'm a redhead."
Tymora: "Ought to be blond."
Sune : "Oh, I tried that one century. I remember Tempus liked it a lot. Especially when I dressed up in wolfskins for that costume party. Kept asking how many times I could 'rage' in one evening." [giggle]
Tymora: "Such a skillful pickup line."
Sune : "Clever, I know. Say, maybe you should try Tempus out sometime, Myssie. He's got a lot of energy."
Mystra: "All he ever talks about are his battles. If I want someone who'll just talk about his work, I'd just stick with Kel."
Sune : "Oh, come on, why do you want a guy to talk to? That's what we're here for. Just use guys as distractions. It keeps you sane through all the day-in, day-out work of godhood. Especially with all the prayers I get every day. Oh, by Ao, it's tiring."
Tymora: "All you have is just people asking for someone to fall in love with them. I have to deal with people asking me for help every other minute with finding a lost pin or nail. They even ask for help in fighting! Tempus wants me to stop doing that, anyway. Claims I'm taking his prayers and making him look bad at the end of every fiscal century."
Mystra: "At least he's generally nice about it. You don't have someone evil to the core trying to introduce new magic."
Tymora: "No, I do have someone evil, remember?"
Mystra: "Oh, right. Beshaba."
Tymora: "Beshaba. I don't know how that girl stays in business. How many worshipers do you get with her platform, anyway?"
Sune : "Hello? We were talking about important stuff, remember? Now, come on, Myssie, we need to give you another makeover."
Mystra: "Now? Again ?"
Sune : "No time like the present! And maybe you could get Lathander. He needs to get over losing Tyche. Too bad that last plan of his didn't work."
Tymora: "I'm right here ."
Sune : "Oh! Hehe. Sorry. Didn't think."
Tymora: "That's painfully obvious."
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