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Ladejarl
Seeker
Norway
55 Posts |
 Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 15:09:47
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quote:
Originally posted by Sanishiver
I liked it.
<runs for cover>
 Missed him!
I don't get those fireballs of as fast as I used to. 
quote:
Originally posted by Talwyn
I'm putting my dibs in for "By Tempus' mighty jockstrap"
By Valkur's strapping buttocks is a nice one to.
And, on topic: If this preview are representative for the whole, I can only say: 
There is Ed's contribution, of cause. |
"There should be much less violence, and more nudity and kinkiness in the world." |
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Uzzy
Senior Scribe
United Kingdom
618 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 16:13:58
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| That is embarrassingly bad. I'd be ashamed to put something out like that at a fanmade level. |
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Uzzy
Senior Scribe
United Kingdom
618 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 16:33:49
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Anyone else noticed that Curuvar can be found in a tavern. Where he gives out this fetch quest?
By Mystra's lost spell, it's like Paizo never existed. Was I spoiled by the imagination and depth shown in their adventures? Should all adventures really be started off in a tavern, where a higher level wizard tells them to go get something? |
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Kiaransalyn
Senior Scribe
United Kingdom
762 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 16:40:29
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quote:
Originally posted by capnvan
By the leftovers stuck in Shaundakul's beard, I confess you're right!
By Tyr's lost right hand, I have nothing else to say.  |
Death is Life
Love is Hate
Revenge is Forgiveness
Ken: You from the States?
Jimmy: Yeah. But don't hold it against me.
Ken: I'll try not to... Just try not to say anything too loud or crass. |
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Garen Thal
Master of Realmslore
USA
1105 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 17:07:39
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This is, unfortunately, as genuine a "Where's the Beef?!?" preview as I've ever seen.
Honestly, I do understand that Loudwater is intended as a "starter town" [Who runs Starter Town? MasterBlaster! But I digress...], but without the context for readers, NPC information is useless. For 3E, giving the game stats and information for Drizzt or Alusair Obarskyr made sense; we knew who these people were. Showing off NPC information, which links to adventure hooks that are unfamiliar to the reader, isn't a good use of preview space.
I imagine that the text, seen as a whole in FRCG, is more useful and enjoyable, but right now, it doesn't leave me wanting to read the book. I'll read the book, of course, but the article itself seems like a wasted opportunity.
Frankly, I'd have been happier seeing the Cormyr article from Dragon #365 first. But that's no surprise to anyone, now, is it? |
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Mkhaiwati
Learned Scribe
USA
252 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 18:21:58
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quote:
Originally posted by Garen Thal
This is, unfortunately, as genuine a "Where's the Beef?!?" preview as I've ever seen.
*snip*
Frankly, I'd have been happier seeing the Cormyr article from Dragon #365 first. But that's no surprise to anyone, now, is it?
By Helm's Shining Codpiece of Restraint ! I agree with both points above. I wonder why they are saving that Cormyr article for last. |
"Behold the work of the old... let your heritage not be lost but bequeath it as a memory, treasure and blessing... Gather the lost and the hidden and preserve it for thy children."
"not nale. not-nale. thog help nail not-nale, not nale. and thog knot not-nale while nale nail not-nale. nale, not not-nale, now nail not-nale by leaving not-nale, not nale, in jail." OotS #367 |
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Rinonalyrna Fathomlin
Great Reader
USA
7106 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 18:22:24
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quote:
Originally posted by Faraer
(Other than that, it looks rather like the Freedale material in the 1995 Introduction to AD&D box.)
Please elaborate. |
"Instead of asking why we sleep, it might make sense to ask why we wake. Perchance we live to dream. From that perspective, the sea of troubles we navigate in the workaday world might be the price we pay for admission to another night in the world of dreams."
--Richard Greene (letter to Time) |
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Rinonalyrna Fathomlin
Great Reader
USA
7106 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 18:24:23
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quote:
Originally posted by Kiaransalyn
Curuvar sounds a lot like Curunir and Curumo, and Loudwater is a direct lift. Why not be fair and use the name "Loudwind"?
To be fair, Loudwater isn't new--it's existed in the Realms for a long time.
At first glance I thought Lady Moonfire looked a bit odd--she's grinning in a way that one might regard as freaky rather than inviting. |
"Instead of asking why we sleep, it might make sense to ask why we wake. Perchance we live to dream. From that perspective, the sea of troubles we navigate in the workaday world might be the price we pay for admission to another night in the world of dreams."
--Richard Greene (letter to Time) |
Edited by - Rinonalyrna Fathomlin on 16 Jul 2008 18:27:37 |
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The Red Walker
Great Reader
USA
3567 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 19:18:15
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quote:
Originally posted by Rinonalyrna Fathomlin
quote:
Originally posted by Kiaransalyn
Curuvar sounds a lot like Curunir and Curumo, and Loudwater is a direct lift. Why not be fair and use the name "Loudwind"?
To be fair, Loudwater isn't new--it's existed in the Realms for a long time.
At first glance I thought Lady Moonfire looked a bit odd--she's grinning in a way that one might regard as freaky rather than inviting.
Thats what they are going for dear, freaky 
After all WOT$ used this sentance to describe her :"Lady Moonfire makes an effort to speak with the characters, especially if at least one PC is a tiefling. Lady Moonfire is attracted to tieflings, and she might court a tiefling character who at any point succeeds on a DC 15 Diplomacy check while around her."
So make yourself a new tiefling character(Male or Female is apparently up to you!), siddle on up to the hottie who runs the town(or does she?), keep cracking crass remarks and witty witicisms until she likes one and takes to her bed to ravish you!
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A little nonsense now and then, relished by the wisest men - Willy Wonka
"We need men who can dream of things that never were." -
John F. Kennedy, speech in Dublin, Ireland, June 28, 1963
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Edited by - The Red Walker on 16 Jul 2008 19:19:16 |
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Faraer
Great Reader
3308 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jul 2008 : 19:41:02
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quote:
Originally posted by Rinonalyrna Fathomlin
Please elaborate.
It was nominally set in the Realms but didn't feel like it, the whole mini-setting serving the sole purpose of the immediate adventure rather than seeming any kind of world in its own right, and with the same sort of simple-mindedness: 'We're free!' 'I'm a wizard!'quote:
At first glance I thought Lady Moonfire looked a bit odd--she's grinning in a way that one might regard as freaky rather than inviting.
The illustration does more to suggest what she might be like outside the preprogrammed dialogue paths than the text.
You know, that 900-word piece manages to go against at least half a dozen Realms design principles. |
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Asgetrion
Master of Realmslore
Finland
1564 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 00:11:19
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quote:
Originally posted by Kiaransalyn
Curuvar sounds a lot like Curunir and Curumo, and Loudwater is a direct lift. Why not be fair and use the name "Loudwind"?
I think I can do better.
Curvilinear - This middle-aged man looks as though he's just staggered out from the pages of an illustrated history of wizards, the one with the really big font and the paint by numbers pictures. With a long black beard that is decorated with semi=precious stones, a robe stitched with astrological symbols, a staff set with a fossilized turd, and a pointed hat, which he calls Gundulf, Curvilinear would stand out even among other wizards, simply because they would run away from him very quickly.
However, once his trust is earned, it becomes clear he is fond of the phrase “by Baghtru’s imagination.”
“Yes, I did indeed sneak into the barrow. By Baghtru’s imagination, you wouldn’t believe what a dull race goblins are! It's almost as if they are just designed to stand around all-day waiting to be killed by some big, dumb ox of an adventurer. Present company excluded, of course."
My wizardry easily incapacitated them. Or was it my whiskey breath? However, I didn’t find what I wanted. Although, there were two of everything else. I took the horn totem as a souvenir. It makes a very charming paper-weight and I polish my horn totem often. Tell you what—if you recover the matching skull totem from the barrow, I’ll tell you the truth about the Ogre King. Will you be friends and buy your old buddy a drink?”
At this Curvilinear staggers off muttering "It's not unusual to be loved by anyone..."
As for Lady Moonfire, she looks fairly foxy. Alas, her description doesn't add to that first impression. She's a half-elf living in a house described as "a jewel of dwarven craftsmanship." That jars a little.
She's regarded as the head of the town but leaves her duties to others. So, surely she's regarded as a wealthy socialite then and the townsfolk will have another person they regard as the actual head of the town.
With names like the Green Tankard tavern and Dire Wood it's clear that the designers are just making names up on the spot. What's wrong with the Green Dragon...a hah I see what you've done! It's a good job that Loudwater isn't a flooded river estuary otherwise the adventurers might have to explore the Dire Ria.
I think this phrase sums it all up: "Your abilities match your ambitions, it seems." They certainly do.
To be fair, Dire Wood is part of the FR Canon, too (See: 'Savage Frontier', 'The North' Boxed Set, 'Volo's Guide to the North', 'The Silver Marches', 'Return of the Archwizards' and a host of other accessories). I agree that 'The Green Tankard' is kind of bland -- probably inspired by 'The Lonesome Tankard' in Eveningstar. Otherwise it indeed seems that the author used Tolkien as another source of inspiration, and the names kind of feel "Proto-Realmsian" (e.g. Curuvar, Darradraugh (or whatever it was)) as a result. Those "hooks" and "dialogue bits" are just the worst I've seen in a while... |
"What am I doing today? Ask me tomorrow - I can be sure of giving you the right answer then."
-- Askarran of Selgaunt, Master Sage, speaking to a curious merchant, Year of the Helm |
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KnightErrantJR
Great Reader
USA
5402 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 00:19:17
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| By Helm's Long Lost Respect, this whole making up trite catch phrases is fun . . . now I know what Burt Ward must have felt like! |
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Mkhaiwati
Learned Scribe
USA
252 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 06:41:58
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quote:
Originally posted by KnightErrantJR
By Helm's Long Lost Respect, this whole making up trite catch phrases is fun . . . now I know what Burt Ward must have felt like!
By Beshaba's Bouncing Bosom,I think you are correct. |
"Behold the work of the old... let your heritage not be lost but bequeath it as a memory, treasure and blessing... Gather the lost and the hidden and preserve it for thy children."
"not nale. not-nale. thog help nail not-nale, not nale. and thog knot not-nale while nale nail not-nale. nale, not not-nale, now nail not-nale by leaving not-nale, not nale, in jail." OotS #367 |
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Talwyn
Learned Scribe
Australia
222 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 07:37:24
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| By Tymora's tremendous tits! |
Over the centuries, mankind has tried many ways of combating the forces of evil...prayer, fasting, good works and so on.
Up until Doom, no one seemed to have thought about the double-barrel shotgun.
EAT LEADEN DEATH DEMON!
Terry Pratchett
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Bakra
Senior Scribe
628 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 14:18:26
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Which sounds better?
By Chaunteas’ fertile fields!
Or
By Sunes’ fertile fields!
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I hope Candlekeep continues to be the friendly forum of fellow Realms-lovers that it has always been, as we all go through this together. If you don’t want to move to the “new” Realms, that doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with either you or the “old” Realms. Goodness knows Candlekeep, and the hearts of its scribes, are both big enough to accommodate both. If we want them to be.
(Strikes dramatic pose, raises sword to gleam in the sunset, and hopes breeches won’t fall down.)
Enough for now. The Realms lives! I have spoken! Ale and light wines half price, served by a smiling Storm Silverhand fetchingly clad in thigh-high boots and naught else! Ahem . .
So saith Ed. <snip>
love to all,
THO
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Kiaransalyn
Senior Scribe
United Kingdom
762 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 14:29:21
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quote:
Originally posted by Asgetrion
To be fair, Dire Wood is part of the FR Canon, too (See: 'Savage Frontier', 'The North' Boxed Set, 'Volo's Guide to the North', 'The Silver Marches', 'Return of the Archwizards' and a host of other accessories).
By Velsharoon's dessicated gonads, I did indeed make a blunder with regards to Dire Wood. As I discovered last night when I dusted of my copy of the Forgotten Realms Campaign Setting 3rd Edn. In fact, I would be better saying "by the hubris of Karsus." |
Death is Life
Love is Hate
Revenge is Forgiveness
Ken: You from the States?
Jimmy: Yeah. But don't hold it against me.
Ken: I'll try not to... Just try not to say anything too loud or crass. |
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Rinonalyrna Fathomlin
Great Reader
USA
7106 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 18:50:23
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quote:
Originally posted by Faraer
It was nominally set in the Realms but didn't feel like it, the whole mini-setting serving the sole purpose of the immediate adventure rather than seeming any kind of world in its own right, and with the same sort of simple-mindedness: 'We're free!' 'I'm a wizard!'
Thanks for elaborating.
quote:
The illustration does more to suggest what she might be like outside the preprogrammed dialogue paths than the text.
Great point. |
"Instead of asking why we sleep, it might make sense to ask why we wake. Perchance we live to dream. From that perspective, the sea of troubles we navigate in the workaday world might be the price we pay for admission to another night in the world of dreams."
--Richard Greene (letter to Time) |
Edited by - Rinonalyrna Fathomlin on 18 Jul 2008 02:18:29 |
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The Hooded One
Lady Herald of Realmslore
5056 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 20:07:43
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Full agreement.
On a less serious note: ahem, Talwyn dear, do you know what Tymora did to the last foolish mortal who uttered that particular oath?
She gave him his own pair, and they were tremendous. Each the size of his entire chest, their weight bending him over instantly.
'Twas a pity he was in a small fishing boat at the time. They kept his drowned corpse floating nicely, though. 
love,
THO
P.S. Yes, this is Realmslore, and not something I'm making up. Mirt could have invented it, but the priestess of Tymora who was at the same feast didn't react as if he was. |
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ShadezofDis
Senior Scribe
402 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 20:21:13
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quote:
Originally posted by The Hooded One
Full agreement.
On a less serious note: ahem, Talwyn dear, do you know what Tymora did to the last foolish mortal who uttered that particular oath?
She gave him his own pair, and they were tremendous. Each the size of his entire chest, their weight bending him over instantly.
'Twas a pity he was in a small fishing boat at the time. They kept his drowned corpse floating nicely, though.
love,
THO
P.S. Yes, this is Realmslore, and not something I'm making up. Mirt could have invented it, but the priestess of Tymora who was at the same feast didn't react as if he was.
I'm actually surprised it wasn't Torm. |
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Markustay
Realms Explorer extraordinaire
USA
15724 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 21:00:33
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Not completely unexpected (bland, generic fantasy lore - just insert characters), but still... I had some hope left for this thing. 
quote:
Originally posted by ShadezofDis
All in all, it makes me wonder just what they're doing at the WotC offices.
Writing Novels.
I'm fairly certain they spend 99% of their 'office time' patting each other on the back, talking about how 'kewl' they are.  |
"I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me" --- Dudley Field Malone
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Edited by - Markustay on 17 Jul 2008 21:01:11 |
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Asgetrion
Master of Realmslore
Finland
1564 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jul 2008 : 21:59:35
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quote:
Originally posted by Markustay
Not completely unexpected (bland, generic fantasy lore - just insert characters), but still... I had some hope left for this thing.
quote:
Originally posted by ShadezofDis
All in all, it makes me wonder just what they're doing at the WotC offices.
Writing Novels.
I'm fairly certain they spend 99% of their 'office time' patting each other on the back, talking about how 'kewl' they are.
Yeah, it's funny... reading the designer blogs implies that they're actually writing a lot of good material for their *own* campaigns. I just wonder if their design philosophy is that "pretty much anything sells anyway" and that is why the online content and adventures (both in Dungeon and KoTS) seem written in a bit "half-hearted" manner? Or is it really that 4E is just about rules and game design, and they concentrating their creative energy towards new rule supplements and game mechanics? |
"What am I doing today? Ask me tomorrow - I can be sure of giving you the right answer then."
-- Askarran of Selgaunt, Master Sage, speaking to a curious merchant, Year of the Helm |
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Talwyn
Learned Scribe
Australia
222 Posts |
Posted - 18 Jul 2008 : 00:15:59
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quote:
Originally posted by The Hooded One
Full agreement.
On a less serious note: ahem, Talwyn dear, do you know what Tymora did to the last foolish mortal who uttered that particular oath?
She gave him his own pair, and they were tremendous. Each the size of his entire chest, their weight bending him over instantly.
'Twas a pity he was in a small fishing boat at the time. They kept his drowned corpse floating nicely, though.
love,
THO
P.S. Yes, this is Realmslore, and not something I'm making up. Mirt could have invented it, but the priestess of Tymora who was at the same feast didn't react as if he was.
*immediately heads to the nearest Tymoran shrine to gamble away his entire life's savings*
Thanks THO, that's a wonderful piece of lore for the community
very much appreciated.
Luck be a Lady tonight! |
Over the centuries, mankind has tried many ways of combating the forces of evil...prayer, fasting, good works and so on.
Up until Doom, no one seemed to have thought about the double-barrel shotgun.
EAT LEADEN DEATH DEMON!
Terry Pratchett
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Kyrene
Senior Scribe
South Africa
757 Posts |
Posted - 18 Jul 2008 : 11:51:05
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quote:
Originally posted by The Hooded One
Full agreement.
On a less serious note: ahem, Talwyn dear, do you know what Tymora did to the last foolish mortal who uttered that particular oath?
She gave him his own pair, and they were tremendous. Each the size of his entire chest, their weight bending him over instantly.
'Twas a pity he was in a small fishing boat at the time. They kept his drowned corpse floating nicely, though.
love,
THO
P.S. Yes, this is Realmslore, and not something I'm making up. Mirt could have invented it, but the priestess of Tymora who was at the same feast didn't react as if he was.
Was the spell she used the one by the same name*? By Mystra's many deaths, I just have to love those transmutation spells...
*Tymora's Tremendous Tits
Brd 4, Sor 5, Wiz 5, Cle (of Tymora) 5
<Trans, VSM(small scrap of lace or silk), extreme-range, Permanent, WillNeg, SR applies>
The target humanoid is permanently transformed to have two breasts, each two size categories smaller than the target, i.e. large humanoid will have breasts the size of two small humanoids. Target is considered carrying the weight of two humanoids of that size, with all the penalties associated with such additional weight. |
Lost for words? Find them in the Glossary of Phrases, Sayings & Words of the Realms
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crazedventurers
Master of Realmslore
United Kingdom
1073 Posts |
Posted - 18 Jul 2008 : 21:51:16
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quote:
Originally posted by Garen Thal
Honestly, I do understand that Loudwater is intended as a "starter town" [
My question is WHY?
Why Loudwater?, given that the Shadowbakers are the 'cool' villians in the world would it not have made more sense to have a starter town in and around the SoFS? That way you have the Cormyr/Sembia/Shadowbakers ongoing war as a backdrop and all those lovely uncovered ruined sites that appear on what was the sea bed, as well as Cormanthyr to explore and what is left of the Moonsea cities and the Zhents, and the now evil twisted Red wizards (again!) to fight against as well as the scarred lands (?) where the dragonborn come from to the south.
Loudwater seems to be out of the way to me, half way between the Shadowbakers of the Anauroch and the Cthul, err slimy squidgy slugs of Abeir.
Just seems an odd place IMO.
Damian |
So saith Ed. I've never said he was sane, have I?
Gods, all this writing and he's running a constant fantasy version of Coronation Street in his head, too. .
shudder,
love to all,
THO
Candlekeep Forum 7 May 2005 |
Edited by - crazedventurers on 18 Jul 2008 21:53:53 |
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Eldacar
Senior Scribe
438 Posts |
Posted - 23 Jul 2008 : 12:56:01
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quote:
Originally posted by The Hooded One
Full agreement.
On a less serious note: ahem, Talwyn dear, do you know what Tymora did to the last foolish mortal who uttered that particular oath?
She gave him his own pair, and they were tremendous. Each the size of his entire chest, their weight bending him over instantly.
'Twas a pity he was in a small fishing boat at the time. They kept his drowned corpse floating nicely, though.
love,
THO
P.S. Yes, this is Realmslore, and not something I'm making up. Mirt could have invented it, but the priestess of Tymora who was at the same feast didn't react as if he was.
Utterly hilarious. 
By the way, it might just be me, but that picture of "Lady Moonfire" reminds me of a Big Brother host in Australia from a few years ago (though I don't watch the show, myself). It almost seems uncanny. |
"The Wild Mages I have met exhibit a startling disregard for common sense, and are often meddling with powers far beyond their own control." ~Volo
"Not unlike a certain travelogue author with whom I am unfortunately acquainted." ~Elminster |
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FRCS first preview
