T O P I C R E V I E W |
Omega |
Posted - 09 Jul 2003 : 16:28:21 I needed to clean the wounds surrounding my head, and also my stomach; it was burnt and I was suffering extremely bad bruising inside my body from when I fell down to the ground from the air. I crept out of the dark building; OH! it was morrow, and the golden sun was raising from the low banks of Faerun in the east. Three thousand shades of green and tan filled my eyes with colour, and it looked gently as if I was part of it, for my body itself was green with envy; I wanted the power of the shadowmaster as well. I felt different from the night before: last night, I had turned evil, for the offense that I had caused was much more appalling than anything the worst rogues have done to people in recent decades. But this morning was different. I had slept, occasionally turning over on the wooden, oaken floorboards to ease myself of the enthralling pain that had overcome my entire body. The voice- where was the voice? Perhaps it was an excitable hallucination of the third kind, perhaps an encounter with the magic of the red citadel? Who dares quest the knightly knowledge of Faerun after causing so much bustle and hatred between the walls of Candlekeep? Outside the building, there was but a cloud in the sky above my own very feet. I stared, for today, I felt pure of evil; I felt that my own mind was there to help others. I was not needing to provoke distaste of the worst kind; neither was my mind full of fury like many a despised knight of shining armour. But this morning, I felt good, pure, kind, loving; I needed to spread the word that to apologise is to purify oneself of meandering waves, and to refrain from apologising is a heracy- "A HERACY!" I shouted aloud in my highest voice tone, scaring the crows in the wavering trees. There was a path in front of my eyes.. Should I follow it, to preach against evil of the highest forte? Yes, I decided that very day. "Yes, I'll tell a word to every person in Faerun that he who kills and offends will be despised of; though he who apolls will be loved for evermore. But I was unable to walk a long distance: I had a burnt hole that travelled from the space between my temples throughout my head and that appeared again near my spine. I also had a wound the size of the shield on my chest, a gash where I had fallen from twelve feet in the air beneath me, and a lot of internal bleeding. I could only prey that somebody would find me. As the sun arose yet higher in the sky, the light brought with it an ability for me, for the light of Faerun easily eagers the eyes of a man turned good at heart. I could, due to the gleaming golden sunlight, see an inn, probably about 6000ft away from where I was standing. I crawled across the grass that surrounded the inn, to pick a branch from a Yew tree. I turned the branch twice around my hand, bended it, and turned it around little revolutions before my left eye: there! I had a telescope! I aimed the scope at the building. It was made of slabs of luscious red wood, and it was crafted so that the windows looked out on the horizon. Oh, it was merely a beautiful piece of art, and I could see chimneys that were belching little puffs of pink, blue, and yellow smoke out in to the sky. A ruddy fellow appeared, puffing on a pipe the size of a leg, and smiled. There was obviously a lot of merriment connected to that inn. I would stay where I was put for the time being, gaining strength hour by hour until I could get confidence to walk down the hill. Tomorrow, I'd venture the inn. |
6 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
aneama |
Posted - 12 Jul 2003 : 19:43:24 yeah but you fall through the air not onto it. |
Omega |
Posted - 11 Jul 2003 : 16:41:03 If you read on in my story, you will soon see what the importantnessissity is of air, good travellers. |
Omega |
Posted - 10 Jul 2003 : 16:40:53 "Air Beneath me" means that I was in the air, and because I was so frighteningly high, the air was literally beneath me! |
Pendangorth |
Posted - 09 Jul 2003 : 18:52:24 Typos is a much better word to use, I make many of them myself, end of story.
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aneama |
Posted - 09 Jul 2003 : 18:38:27 Perhaps you should just leave the mistakes as typos pendangorth, anyway very good omega. Though, i am curious, what did you do that was so terrible? and as creative criticism, though trying not to sound like pendangoerth, you said that you "from twelve feet in the air beneath me" I would like to ask onto what? the air beneath you? I don't really give a pair of fetid dingos kidneys but it doesn't make sense to me. sorry. |
Pendangorth |
Posted - 09 Jul 2003 : 18:25:23 Very good again, Omega. You have a talent for writing.
Omega, have you noticed the mob rising up aginst me because I notified two people of spelling errors? I wasn't even being offensive... |
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